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My five year old won't stop lying!

"Hello Annie

I'm mom to a nearly five year old boy and I'm hoping you can help me. He's a terrible liar. Last night he took some expensive make up belonging to me and ground the lipstick in to the carpet and broke the rest. I know he did it as his little sister is too young and besides I found the remnants hidden in his room. I confronted him but he won't admit to doing it. This kind of thing has happened several times. Can you help?

Natasha"

Hello Natasha

It's upsetting when your child breaks something of yours on purpose and then won't come clean. Children lie mostly because they're afraid of getting in to trouble and the behavior is common, particularly in early childhood. However, with your son almost at the age of five and the fact that this is not an isolated incident, I think the time has come for you to make a stronger statement. My daughter had a similar problem at a similar age, so let me tell you how I dealt with it. Not far from us, we have a amusement park which was one my daughter's favourite places. She was hopeful that we would go to the first opening weekend, but up to that point I had been careful not to promise as I was unsure as to whether I could truly make it. After she lied again, I realized I would have to do something that would stick with her, so I told her that we would indeed be going to the amusement park on it's opening weekend. We put a big circle around the date on the calendar and her excitement grew as the day grew closer. On the day, with my sons in on the plan, I packed a big picnic lunch and we all piled in the car. We drove in to the park's parking lot, around the parking lot, out of the parking lot and back on to the highway. After a minute or so, my daughter asked "Why aren't we going to the park? " My reply was, "Guess what.....I lied!" I can't remember her actual response, but I do remember that she went white. I'm happy to say that it worked well as she's now nine and has never lied since. This may sound a bit extreme, but it worked and what's more it's now become a fond family memory of just how far mom will go, if pushed. There may be other variations on this theme, but if I was you, I'd find something that he really cares about and try a similar technique. Along with your own response, you also might want to get to the bottom of why he wanted to ruin your make-up in the first place. It sounds like there may be something on his mind. Best of luck.

Annie

Date Entered: 2006-07-24 17:33:11.0
Date Last Modified: 2006-07-24 17:39:18.0

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