Annie's Tips

    Annie The Nanny's Tips For A Happy Home.

    1. Be a leader.  Children have a need not only for love but for reliable authority figures.  As such, they look to you to provide direction and clear expectations for their behavior. If you negotiate constantly change your expectations, or look to them as to what to do next, your little ones feel that no-one is leading the family and so they try to fill the void. No small child is able to handle such a responsibility, so they feel unsafe.  When any child feels unsafe they will ramp up their behavior to get you to take control of the situation and make them feel secure. If you don't, the behavior will worsen as your child, panicked, desperately tries to get you to reassume leadership of the family.

    2.  Make normal life the focus and not the kids..

    It's become normal these days for parents to spend their days entertaining their children.  The trouble is it's a mistake as children need to be part of life and not the focus of it.  Children are hard wired to watch and imitate you and play along side you. If you allow that to happen naturally they will be happy little campers but if you constantly spend your time trying to entertain them or discover what they want to do next, you will find that they will become more and more demanding and frequently far less happy.

    3. Give them some freedom.

    Children these days are breaking down in record numbers at university because they can't handle living an independent life. Remember the final goal of being a parent is for your children to eventually live without you taking care of them. Your children will never gain independence if you don't let them experience it.  Sensible precautions are fine, constant supervision, especially as they age, is not.

    4. Have fun with your children.
    With all the stress of parenting today, sometimes this gets lost in the shuffle. Your children want to have fun with you and as long as you don't spend all your time focussing on them, that is just fine. When they least expect it, dance in the rain, build sand castles, sing in parking lots. Enjoy yourself and your children. They are only young once.

    5. Trust your instincts.
    Raising your child nowadays requires negotiating a minefield of contradictory parenting practices. Just remember something though, we've been on this planet some 160,000 years and although things change, much remains the same. You've got instincts for a reason. Trust yourself and listen to them .

    This is not, by any means, an exhaustive list but it will give you an idea of where I'm coming from.